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Saturday 27 April 2013


WOULD THE WRONG TYPE OF PASSENGER PLEASE LEAVE THE TRAIN?  BRITAIN’S RAIL NETWORK SINKS TO A NEW LOW AND IN TURN GETS ME VERY ANGRY!



Now, on my blog I rarely rant.  I tell stories, I list favourite things and I give the occasional political and financial view on what is happening in the world but I rarely vent my rage here.  I leave that for other people, but every now and then something happens that means I can’t let something go, that I have to be enraged, that I have to let go of a fury that is tearing apart my insides and today is one of those days, “but why?” I hear you ask.  Well let’s find out.

Now as part of my daily commute from Manchester to Preston I have to endure the connecting train from Bolton to Salford Central, a journey that always suffers from overcrowding and you rarely get a seat.  In the mornings the services provided NORTHERN RAIL is, shall we say, a tad over-subscribed and on the return journey home yesterday the train at Salford Central was more packed than usual.  Of course it doesn’t help when the rush hour trains are only what I would class as 2-carriage catastrophes, some of these trains are so bad that in the past I have struggled to put a sufficient bad description for them.  I would call them buses on tracks but this would be unfair to bus travel which can be far comfier, I would label them as cattle cars with seats but of course their are legal limits on the numbers of cattle one can have in cattle cars, not so with human beings on todays rail network.

So with this in mind we go from Central to Crescent to take on the last load of passengers before proceeding to Bolton.  It is here when people start to load in that the train gets really packed.  It is so full people at the station are struggling to board and it is then that an announcement is made that I have never heard before.

“WOULD CUSTOMERS GOING TO BOTLON LEAVE THE TRAIN AND GET THE NEXT ONE SO THAT PASSENGERS FOR BLACKPOOL CAN GET ON THE TRAIN?”

Yes, we Bolton travellers were the WRONG type of passenger and our journey requirements classed as, what they call in management groups, “Low Priority”.  I have little doubt that it is these self-same management groups that when having such meetings come up with such ideas.  I imagine the conversation goes something like this.

“Boss, we can’t fit everyone on our trains, what should we do?”

“Take some off so you can fit more on, Stupid.  Duh!”

“But then won’t those passengers then be left on the station?”

“Yeah, but they are low-priority, they can get the next train, idiot!”

“But what if that one’s full?”

“Then we’ll take some passengers off that one.  Do I have to do all the thinking round here?!”

Now with such fiendish intellects in charge of our rail networks it’s no wonder that the service is going swimmingly but in reality there were a couple of things that prevented this plan being the idea of genius, firstly take a look at these pictures.




HOW THE FUCK WAS ANYONE MEANT TO GET OFF THIS TRAIN?  Look at the state of it.  JUST LOOK AT IT!  In this train which supposedly holds around 103 passengers seated I counted at least 34 standing in this carriage alone and that’s the people in my line of sight, there may have been others I couldn’t see but this meant that if the same story was repeated in the next carriage that the train was over-subscribed by up to 62%.  

That’s the first thing the management team may wish to look at, the next being this.


PASSENGERS DO NOT LIVE AT FUCKING TRAIN STATIONS!!!  In a board room hundreds of miles away from reality it must seem like if your train is delayed by 5 minutes then you are only delayed by 5 minutes but of course for anyone who commutes we all know that this is not true.  Many people who commute have to make a second journey either by another train or by another mode of transport like a bus which is what I endure.  If I had elected to get off here I would have missed the bus I should have been on and had to catch the next one and they are every 10 minutes.

“You only had to wait 10 minutes for the next bus?  Big deal” I hear you say, BUT WAIT, that night as I managed to catch the bus I should have been on (Just!) I noticed that as I left Bolton 2 busses turned up at once meaning that this “DELAY OF ONLY A FEW MINUTES” would have transformed into a delay of 20 minutes (My bus ten minutes later being delayed by another 10 minutes.  10 + 10 = 20!)

And the worst thing about all of this is that in spite of me having a damn good bitch on here about the terrible state of the network nothing will change.  Northern Rail have supposedly hit their targets set and the franchise has been extended.  Comfort, customer satisfaction, overcrowding and safety are just the few things I wonder are included in such surveys.  Safety no doubt will be included but only in terms of deaths and serious injury (In the large standing areas when the trains are overcrowded there’s often nothing to hold onto except other passengers and when these buckets take a corner.  GULP!)  

So in honour of our lousy network, that sees the company with the highest customer satisfaction level attempted to be replaced on the Great Western Line by the newtork at the bottom of the same surveys.  See below for just how satisfied FIRST rail passengers look!





Please see some of my favourite photo’s which really do show an insider view of our clapped-out dilapidated private rail network.













I’m Mr Chatable and you’ve really pissed me off!

http://www.buzzpatrol.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Samuel-L-Jackson-in-Pulp-Fiction.jpg

Sunday 21 April 2013


HOW A DISPUTE BETWEEN THE BOYS HELPED TO REMIND ME OF THE JOYS OF PARENTHOOD.



A dispute ...Reminding me of the joys of parenthood ...How?

Well I’ll explain, you see as anyone with young children will tell you, from when they are first born you are their entire world and it is an amazing feeling.  Tiring, draining, exhausting to the point where you can barely function at times but so rewarding you can’t imagine the time before when they weren’t there, and at this time impressing them is easy, the slightest thing makes them laugh and they look on you like you own the moon, but eventually they get friends, go to school and grow up and know that you are not a God who owns the moon but a mortal like them who makes mistakes and is just fumbling through life.  When they’re young they have no problem telling you they love you and everything about their day but eventually they stop, they don’t tell you about their friends about what they’re up to and communication becomes, shall we say problematic.

BUT, sometimes even when they’re older things happen that remind you of those magical times when they were younger, that show you just how much you mean to them, and sometimes these these things occur in unusual ways, for example:

Zoe was going out with friends one night and it left me and Ethan inside to watch a film and have a bit of a boys night, NOW, like I said as he now makes the transition from boyhood to manhood I wanted to show him how far I thought he had come by watching a film that was adult in theme (not that way!) to show his advancing maturity, and, after providing him with a selection, he opted for Quentin Tarentino’s powerhouse masterpiece “PULP FICTION”.

To say we had a great night watching it would be an understatement and watching it with someone who GOT IT made it all the richer an experience, as it made it feel like I was watching it for the first time myself and with so many good moments it’s hard to pick favourites, for me it’s 

“But I’m trying, Ringo ...I’m trying REAL hard to be the shepherd!” 

Now for Ethan it was “SAY WHAT AGAIN, I DARE YOU, I DOUBLE DARE YOU, MOTHER F***ER!”  He really liked this line at the end of a superb exchange that also included “THEY SPEAK ENGLISH IN WHAT?  ENGLISH, DO YOU SPEAK IT, MOTHER F***ER!” but like I said it was the “DOUBLE DARE YOU” line he really enjoyed the most and promptly walked around quoting this line randomly afterwards without the swearing when younger ears were around.



So therefore you can imagine just how shocked he was when he was in the kitchen with his Mum and Riley and he said “SAY WHAT AGAIN, I DARE YOU...” only to have Riley finish the line and say “I DOUBLE DARE YOU!”

Now needless to say Ethan was rather peeved by this.  He and I had watched the film together as it was a way of me saying to him that I recognised he was growing up only to have Riley steal his moment.  How could a seven year old know of such a line from what is a very adult film?  Ethan had to know how?

“How do you know that line?” Ethan asked, perplexed.

“Daddy showed me?” Riley stated, only for Ethan to be more dumbfounded.

Now I should at this stage state that for the record I had not showed Riley “PULP FICTION”.  What Riley was referring to was this at 55 seconds in.



So why did this bring back the joy of being a parent?  Well I’ll tell you, you see your kids  stop telling you they love you and they stop being communicative but every now and then they do still show you they care providing you don’t stop trying for them.  If you keep giving them your time, showing them you care and treating them well, then they will tell you they love you, even if I love you actually comes out as “I DOUBLE DARE YOU, MOTHER F***ER!”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=czb4jn5y94g
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZkqC4Lz8dU

Wednesday 3 April 2013


THE THERAPEUTIC JOY OF WRITING BOND - THE FINAL PART OF THE BEST BOND FILM NEVER MADE.




So this is the final part of my massive task of writing a Bond script and I've really enjoyed.  With these things the danger is that you'll wind up creating some crappy wish fulfilment story or something that feels kiddish or just write something that's been done badly before and re-write that ...Badly!  Nightmare.

But after all these weeks of getting in the head of the world's greatest spy I do feel at the end of it I did get to know him quite well along with all of the other aspects of his story ...His dog, snowy, his plucky assistant, Bucky, his enchanted hammer (Forged in the heart of a dying star) Mjolnir, his flying car, Chitty-Chitty Bang-Bang, while all the while working for the fictional espionage organisation S.H.I.E.L.D.

Yep, by the time I'd finished I knew the world's greatest secret agent, Flint McMissile pretty well!

So now with all that silliness aside I now present the final part of TOMORROW IS NEVER GOLDEN TILL IT DIES WITH DIAMONDS ON HER MAJESTY'S SECRET LASER.  Of course I'm kidding but here is, in all seriousness the final part of the deadliest prey.

Read the end bit after the script, enjoy, leave a comment, Google plus and share if you do enjoy. 

THE DEADLIEST PREY PART 3 


Cut to:  INT:  M’s office.  Bond walks in nonchalant but respectful.  M’s eyes don’t leave the reports sprawled across his desk.)

M
Nasty one this one ...Three dead operatives, a billionaire with an unnatural death and an air conditioning system loaded with a biological agent that, as it turns out, has nothing wrong with it.

(Bond’s face hardens at that news as he knows his hunch is right.)
Bond
It has to be there.  Gillam was clearly referring to population when we started to question him, a biological agent is the only thing that makes sense.

M
It’s been examined up and down sideways all the filters have been removed, the airline launch postponed with the makers demanding ten million dollars per day in recompense for every day their planes remain on the tarmac.

Bond
May I see the report, sir?

M
Please.

(Bond flicks through the pages his eyes picking out the key words, “INERT”, “NO BIOLOGICAL AGENTS”, “LINT” and “DUST PARTICLES”.  The pages flick by with charts, graphs and reams of analysis all concluding the same thing, that the system that they tore apart was safe with no credible threat to the planet.)

M
I don’t wish to pressure you but even you standing there is costing the UK government a considerable amount of money.

(Bond studies the report and ponders what he and Q discussed.)

Bond
Have you tried putting an electrical current through the dust and lint?

M
An electrical current?

Bond
Ernst was involved in bio-tech, chem-tech and nano-tech.  It’s conceivable that the virus is some kind of hybrid of all three, but being nano-tech needs a charge sent through it to be activated which is why there’s dust on the filters as it would see to be the best place to hide it.

M
I hope you’re right , 007.  This entire situation is...

(M reaches for his phone which rings before he has had chance to pick it up.)

M
M, here.  Hello, Q.  Really?  I’m on my way.

(Puts phone down.)

M
With me 007.  We have a summons from the morgue.

(Cut to:  INT:  Morgue.  Bill Tanner is stood with Q looking through a glass window.  A corpse lies on the table and the mortician carries a tray over to the glass.  M and Bond walk down the corridor, purpose on their faces.)


M
Do you mind telling me what’s so important that I had to see for myself, Bill?

Q
We’ve found out what killed Victor Ernst.

(Q nods at the glass as one of the forensic staff plant down a large glass case, inside what looks like a tiny box, slightly bigger and chunkier than a sim card with 8 hair thin silver strands emanating out from it lie dormant.)

M
What is that?

(Immediately the device springs to life, its strands lashing round like a whip and expanding out ever further as it shivers and shakes probing out in the box.)

Bond
That’s the device that was keeping his degenerative brain disorder at bay.

Q
It appears to be a lot more than that.

Bond
What exactly is it?

Q
From what we can gather it appears to be, or rather still is, a neural transmitter.  Those strands weren’t just eating away at the disease they were receiving signals from elsewhere.  They may have been telling him what to do, and what to say, which would explain his final comment in your report.

(For a moment all four men just stare at the device which thrashes around like a vicious invertebrate before Bond breaks the silence.)

Bond
You say it’s a transmitter, how close would you need to be for the transmitter to receive the  signal?

Q
From what we can gather not far.  Only a few metres.

Bond
Nixon.  It’s got to be.  It would explain why he was besides Ernst at all times.  If that device only has a limited range then it explains why he could never afford to be out of Ernst’s sight.

M
And Nixon Albrecht is still out there.  According to surveillance his helicopter landed somewhere on the edge of Russian airspace, the trail goes dead after that.  We’ve alerted the Russian authorities of course but, er, Russia’s the kind of place where it’s easy to get lost.  You should know, 007.


Bond
I don’t think he will hide, sir.  If he was speaking for Ernst then our problems haven’t just ended with the bio-nano weapon.

M
In just a few days with no idea what it is?  Which reminds me, Q, the lint you found on those units, have you tried running a current though it?

Q
No.  But now you’ve mentioned it I’ll get right on it, sir.

M
Good.  (To Bond)  You look like hell, by the way.  When did you last get some sleep, voluntarily?

Bond
I grabbed an hour on the flight back, other than it was probably a couple of days ago.

M
Missions on hiatus now, with Domingo Seles being safe and all.  You can officially catch-up on some shut-eye.

Bond
Yes, sir.  Thank you, sir.

(Bond leaves as M watches the tiny nano-device thrash around in the box seeking out new biological material to infiltrate.

Cut to:  INT:  Black cab.  Bond is traveling in the back of a black London taxi-cab, eyes closed but sat bolt-upright as the cab sashes along.  It comes to a stop outside the Ritz.)

Cabby
Here we are, mate.  The Ritz.

(Bond’s eyes open and his hand instinctively goes to the left of his chest, as he realises there is no danger he instead removes his wallet and pays the cabby.)

Bond
Keep the change.

(Cut to:  INT:  The Ritz reception.  Bond walks into the main lobby area, over the decoratively patterned carpet and up to the desk with three hug mirrors behind to accentuate the opulence.  The woman behind the desk smiles professionally as Bond approaches.)  

Receptionist
Good afternoon, Mister Bond.  Do you require a suite for the evening?

Bond
Sadly, no.  I’m actually here to check in with a friend.  It’s Miss Domingo Seles, should be booked on under Mr and Mrs Seles.

(The receptionist shoots Bond the merest of curious looks before retrieving the information from the computer.)
Bond
They’re brother and sister.

Receptionist
Ah.  I’ll ring up for you.

Bond
Thank you.

(Bond looks around for a moment leaving the relaxed world behind as he scans his environment for both dangers and safe areas.)

Receptionist
She’ll be down in a moment.

Bond
Thank you, again.

(As he looks away his smile fades as he continues to monitor the area, eyes darting around for enemies, exits and weaponry until...)

Domingo
Mister Bond!

(Bond turns to see Domingo bound down the stairs in a pair of jeans, boots, a tight fitting sweater and a welcoming smiles in stark contrast to her initial hostile attitude.)

Bond
Please call me James.

Domingo
James.  (She hugs him tight, let’s go and frowns as she looks at his face.)  You look like hell.

Bond
That seems to be the consensus today.  I just thought I’d check in and make sure you’re okay before I’m posted elsewhere.

Domingo
Do you have time for a drink before then?

Bond
I think we have a little time, yes.

(Cut to:  INT:  Dining rooms.  Bond and Domingo are sat at the bar.  On the bar a row of bottles and accoutrements are lined up in front of them.  The barman allows the zest of a grapefruit to drizzle across two glasses before handing them over and walking away.  Bond and Domingo take a drink and she looks amazed as the semi-sweet elixir hits her taste buds.)

Domingo
My God!  Where in the world did you learn how to concoct that?!

Bond
Cambridge.  A friend and I, Chris Eccles, we’d try to concoct the best drink possible before we hit the town on a Friday night, or a Saturday night ...Or a Thursday night.

Domingo
That sounds like the kind of thing to do after a night out.
Bond
Well we did at the beginning but we found out to our cost that everything tastes great at two a.m after several pints.  That’s why we learnt to master our drink-making skills at the beginning of the evening.

Domingo
Whatever became of your friend?

Bond
He became a Doctor.  He was always going to, it was a family thing, ninth generation I think.

Domingo
And you became something else.  Is that in your family’s blood to?

Bond
You could say that.  (Bond takes another drink to wash away any emotion he may felt momentarily.)  I take it you and your brother are returning to Seattle now you’re safe?




Domingo
We fly back in the morning, although we have to organise the recovery of my father’s vessel from the ocean floor.  There’s no way it’s staying there.  In honesty I wouldn’t mind doing some of the repairs on the ship myself.  It probably sounds silly or sentimental but...

(Bond nods and stares at her fully, finally able to enjoy how she looks without the minor distraction of being held at gunpoint or in mortal peril.)

Domingo
What?

Bond
You’re a remarkable woman, Miss Seles.

Domingo
Thank you.  I ...Erm ...I don’t usually get told that.

Bond
You should.

(She smiles and blushes slightly.)

Domingo
I deal with men all the time.  Usually they just see me as Mister Seles assistant, little more than window dressing to be ogled.  It’s nice to be appreciated for something more than that.

Bond
You’re welcome.


Domingo

You know I've given a lot of thought as to the how's and why's of our escape.  They had all those animals in that zoo, all those predators, but they let the deadliest prey walk with them.  That was their mistake.


Bond

I take that as a compliment.
Domingo
I’d like to show you just how much a compliment that is but Ozul’s snoring is a bit of a mood killer.

(Bond considers booking a suite but as he looks in Domingo’s eyes he realises that may look more tacky than classy.)

Bond
Some other time maybe?

Domingo
Look me up, next time you’re back on the west coast of America.


Bond
Or the east coast of Africa, I will indeed.

Domingo
I look forward to seeing you again.

Bond
Likewise.

(Bond finishes his drink and gets up to leave.)

Domingo
Oh and one more thing.

(Domingo leans over and kisses him slowly and passionately that extends to several more kisses.  The barman sees this and shakes his head as if to say “Here we go again.”)

Domingo
Thank you ...For saving my life.

Bond
With “thank-you”’s like that I might have to make a habit of it.

Domingo
Till next time, Mister Bond ...James.

(Domingo exits first and Bond gets to watch her wiggle exquisitely out of the room.

Cut to:  EXT:  Street.  Bond steps out of the hotel and is about to get in a cab when his instincts kick-in.  He stops and looks up and down the street, aware or suspicious that someone is following him, or watching.  Bond scans the area, window, pedestrians, cars and the spaces in-between.  He grimaces like he knows someone is there but cannot prove it.  He pushes aside the itch that remains unscratched and gets in the cab, unsatisfied.  It’s only when he leaves that a shadowy figure emerges from a doorway.

Cut to:  INT:  Bond’s apartment.  Bond enters his place and flicks his keys into a dish, hangs up his jacket and places his shoes neatly in the rack before making himself a drink, with ice, and collapsing onto a chair, his fingers rubbing the bridge of his nose.  He closes his eyes and rubs his forehead while replaying the pieces of the last day over in his mind ...Gillam’s numbers, M’s numbers and Ernst’s assertion that they would have other thing to worry about that didn’t even come from Ernst.  Bond sits up and starts typing some numbers in his phone to work out the percentages and realises that 5 billion, 130 million removed from the populace leaves 26.78 percent and not the 28 percent that Glllam mentioned.)

Bond
The 130 million is a separate event?

(Bond hits the numbers to ring Felix.  Felix answers after only one ring.)

Felix
Need me to come and save you again?

Bond
No.  In the car you mentioned you knew what the 130 million was.

Felix
Sure do.

(The phone goes quiet.)

Bond
Could I trouble you for that information?

Felix
Sure thing.  130 million is the population of America’s east coast.

(Bond goes quiet for a moment.  His doorbell buzzing alerts him, the intercom system crackles into life.)

Bond
Give me five minutes I’ll call you back.

Felix
Sure.
Giselle
James?  Are you there?  It’s me, Giselle ...”sniff”!

(The sniff instantly gets Bond’s attention and he grabs his gun and slots on the suppressor.  As he walks past the kitchen he picks up a set of tongs and uses them to grab his phone.  He sets himself up at the side of the door as before and presses a different number, which this time comes up with a slightly cheesy and flirty “Hello”.  Before the phone has reached the “o” a blast from a shotgun tears through the door at chest height.  Outside the man lowers his weapon and looks in.  Bond moves in front of the door and makes the shot to the man’s head killing him instantly.  Next to him two more armed men, this time with sub-machine guns open fire.  Bond runs across his apartment, through the living room and dives over the sofa, the front of which is torn to pieces as they unload every bullet they’ve got into the soft foam and leather outage.  Behind the sofa as Bond sits under cover all that can be heard is a high “dink-dink-dink-dink-dink” as the bullets make contact with a steel shield, built-in especially for these rarest of occasions.  Bond waits for the weapons to click-out empty, as they do the men begin to reload.  Bond gets up and shoots one man in the head and chest before he can change magazine, the second man however, not underestimating the threat posed by Bond has his gun ready and starts to fire, this time however he moves forward while shooting at the sofa and when the weapon clicks out he launches himself at Bond and dives over the sofa, knocking Bond to the ground.  Both men struggle for the gun and when the man realises that Bond won’t relinquish his grip he grabs the gun so it releases the magazine and squeezes Bond’s finger so it releases the last round in the chamber.  Pleased with himself the assassin looks in Bond’s eyes expecting to see fear, when Bond smiles the assassin realises this may have been a mistake.  Bond grabs the man’s head, pressing his thumbs into his eyes and rams his head against the metal shield in the sofa.  After three whacks look like they have sufficiently disorientated the assailant Bond whacks his head against the floor and then casually goes to retrieve another gun.  As Bond opens a drawer however the man throws himself into Bond’s back and the wind up sprawling into the kitchen area.  Bond looks at the knife block and picks up the largest knife but the block remains attached.)

Assassin
Ha ha!  Great plan.

(Bond keeps hold of the knife and flicks the block at the man which hits him square in the forehead.)

Bond
Wasn’t it.

(The man grabs a knife and dives at Bond sending them both sprawling over the work unit.  As they crash to the floor the man tries to lunge at Bond, who delays him by smashing a cupboard door in his face.  As he looks in the cupboard he spies some cleaner and sprays the man in the face as he comes closer again, causing immediate physical agony as it burns the sensitive tissue, in spite of this the man continues to lash out with the knife.  Bond therefore decides to disarm him by switching on the cooker and forcing the man’s hand in the flame, which remains in the flame unflinching for an age until he eventually let’s go of the weapon, as he does Bond swings an elbow into the back of the man’s head who sprawls across the pristine work surface, the assassin’s fingers seeking out whatever they can find and stumble over a thin, plastic-covered electric cable.  The semi-blinded man bundles forward and manages to wrap the wire round Bond’s throat and pulls.  Bond falls to the ground and reaches for one of the kitchen drawers.  The man realises what Bond is going for and so pulls him over to the relative safety of the fridge freezer where he can finish garroting him in peace.  Bond, struggling for breath opens the freezer door and reachers inside one of the ice-boxes and removes a frozen fish with edges that come to a point.  It isn’t much a weapon but Bond knows it’s now the only chance he has and with a devil’s strength he rams it inside the man’s guts.  The man looks down in shock as he realises what has happened and as he loosens his grip on the cord to try and remove the impromptu blade from his innards Bond finds the extra strength to ram it fully inside.  For a few seconds the man scrambles at the wound before collapsing while bleeding out.  He looks at Bond in begrudging admiration as Bond removes the wire and rubs at his neck.)

Bond
How’s that for a stomach hake?

(Bond kicks out aggressively at the man’s feet that are sprawled across the floor.)

Bond
Stay there.  I’ll get an ambulance.

(Bond gets up and sees Giselle’s legs on the floor outside his apartment.  He runs over and sees she is shaking in terror but okay.  He helps her up and escorts her inside, putting here eyes against his shoulder.)

Bond
Best you don’t see that.  Here.

(Bond opens a cupboard, reaches up and removes a metal box about 10 by 7 inches.)

Bond
Don’t turn around.

(Bond goes to the kitchen drawer and lifts up the cutlery tray and removes a key, goes back to the box, opens it and removes a wad of £5,000 in fifties.)

Giselle
Are they dead?

Bond
Yes, but don’t focus on them, focus on you.  You need to leave town for some time while all this blows over.  I’ll drop you off at your place, get your passport and then I’ll take you to the airport.  Get the next flight out to anywhere and stay there a month while I take care of this.

Giselle
You’re not an accountant are you?

Bond
No, sorry.  Come on we need to move.

(Bond covers her eyes while they leave the flat, being careful to step over the dead bodies.

Cut to:  INT:  Hotel.  Ozul is on the floor.  He is shot.  Next to him lies a man dead on the floor with a knife in his throat.  On the floor but unharmed is Domingo staring up at the barrel of a gun.

Domingo
WAIT!  There’s one thing you should consider first.

(A man at the window turns to reveal that, somehow, with deep red scars across his features, Cho has survived.)

Cho
What?

Domingo
If you kill us there will be no force on Earth that will stop him from killing you slowly and painfully.  The only hope you have of living is if we live.

Hitman
The boss said we should kill them both.

Cho.
No, she’s right.  Don’t kill them.  Bring her.  Leave him.

(Ozul injured in the chest still tries to get up to fight them off.)

Ozul
NOOOOO!

(One of the hired goons smashes the butt of his automatic into Ozul’s temple sending the big man to the floor, losing consciousness, the last thing he sees are Domingo’s kicking feet as she is removed from the room.

Cut to:  EXT:  Street.  Giselle is sat in the Aston Martin nervously waiting for Bond to come back.  He emerges from her flat and opens the car door.)


Bond
It’s safe.  You get your passport I’ll warm the engine.

Giselle
You will not leave without me will you?

Bond
I promise.



(She nods and heads inside.  Bond removes his phone and presses some numbers.  A familiar voice comes gently down the line.)


Receptionist
Ritz hotel, London.  How can I be of service?

Bond
Trafalgar Suite, please.  The names James Bond, I was there earlier.

Receptionist
Oh, of course, Mister Bond, I’ll ring up for you now.

(Bond waits and eyes a car with suspicion as it drives slowly down the road, his hand instinctively moving toward his jacket pocket, but as the car zooms past with teenagers playing loud music he relaxes.  At the other end of the line the receptionist’s cheery voice comes back on the line.)

Receptionist
Hello, sir.  I’m afraid I can’t reach them at the moment.

Bond
Call the police and an ambulance.  Do it now, please.  

Receptionist
Are you ...Are you sure?

Bond
Miss, time is short.  999.  All right? 

Receptionist
Yes, sir.

(Giselle appears and Bond puts his phone away, scanning the street as he does and then whisks her away without a word.

Cut to:  INT:  Hospital ward.  Bond is walking down a corridor when he hears a huge commotion coming further down.  He runs down the corridor and spies into a room where the noise is coming from.  Bond grimaces and heads inside.)

Ozul
MISTER BOND, THEY WILL NOT LET ME GO!  THEY HAVE DOMINGO!


Bond
Ozul you can’t do any good for her injured, I promise you I will find her but right now you need to stay here and get fixed.

(Ozul’s anger turns to raw emotion as his anger turns to tears, Bond puts his hand on the big man’s uninjured shoulder and speaks in a barely audible whisper.)
Bond
I promise you we will get her back, all right?

(Ozul nods, the tears streaming down his face.)

Bond
(Continues)  Now what can you tell me about those who took her?

Ozul
Their leader was a small Chinese man.  He had scars all across his face.

Bond
The one they called Cho?  Jesus, that man knows less about how to die than I do.

Ozul
We don’t know where they have taken her or anything.

Bond
We’ll find her.  Don’t worry we’re good at that.  I know it’s hard but try and get some rest.

(Bond goes to leave.)

Ozul
What about you getting some rest?

Bond
(Slight smile)  Once Domingo is safe and the mission is over ...I’ll rest then, not until.

(Bond leaves the room and as he passes the window his smile is replaced by a dour determined expression.)

Bond
(Under breath)  When this mission is over.

(Cut to:  INT:  Vauxhall Cross.  SIS Offices.  M, Bond and Bill Tanner are stood around a huge table that is acting as a giant computer screen with a map of the world.  Bond hunches over and stifles a yawn while rubbing the back of his head.)

M
So much for getting some sleep, then.

Bond
I’ll get some shut-eye on the plane out.

M
The question is out where.

Bill Tanner
I think I can answer that, sir.  After 007 told me about the 130 million figure I tried to figure out how that related to the lists of experts who were being killed.

(On the table an image of America’s east coast is suddenly enlarged to show the entire Atlantic ocean and then with a few taps is shrunk back down again to show the West African coast.  Bill then hits a tiny Island which enlarges again with the island’s name right next to it.  Both M and 007 seethe when the see the name of...)

M
Santa Fuego.

Bond
Where 001 was killed.

Tanner
The island has a geological fault running through its middle.  If the fault were to rupture and the island fall into the sea it could, and probably would, trigger a mega-tsunami with 130 million people in its path.

(Tanner taps the screen where the island is and image expands out showing how the tsunami would be generated and how it would creep across the atlantic till it slams into America’s east coast with a red flashing line indicating landfall.)

M
But why do that if they’re planning on wiping out five billion people, why would 130 million mean anything to them?

Bond
I’ll be sure to ask him that, sir, before I put a bullet through his temple and after I’ve found Domingo.

M
She’s now secondary to this mission.  You do understand that, 007?

Bond
(Pause)  Understood.  (His tone and manner while polite indicate that he does anything but that.)

M
When can you be ready to leave?
Bond
As soon as you need me, sir, although I do have just one request.

(Cut to:  INT:  C17 cargo plane.  Cockpit.  Pilots chat while plane leaves the ground.)

Co-Pilot
Can you believe how he’s travelling?

(Camera travels through the cockpit past the first level down to the cargo hold where Bond is asleep in a hammock.

Cut to:  EXT:  Runway.  A private jet lands in darkness on the runway.  Nixon Albrecht greets the passengers as they embark with their prize cargo, Domingo Seles.  A confused look flashes across Nixon’s face.)

Nixon
I thought I told you to kill her.

Cho
I will explain.
Nixon
All right, what about Bond?

(Cho merely shakes his head.)

Nixon
GODDAMMIT!  That guy really doesn’t know how to die.  He’s worse than you.

(Cho nods.  The men man-handle Domingo over.)

Nixon
Miss Seles, we’re glad you could join us.

(Domingo glares at Nixon with hate-filled eyes.)

Domingo
I’m going to enjoy watching you die.

(Nixon laughs)

Nixon
The feeling is more than mutual.  (To Cho)  Get her out of her and prepare the island for a possible incursion.

(Cho nods and moves inside.  Nixon looks at the skyline as the sun creeps above it and then back at his watch.)




Nixon
Not long now.

(Nixon soaks up a few rays as red and purple hues balance on the intimidating sea before rejoining Cho and his captive inside.

Cut to:  INT:  CIA Office.  Felix Leiter is sat knees on his thighs as he contemplates what could happen.  The conversation with M in London earlier narrating over Leiter’s despair as he roles his CIA finger round and looks almost tearful, but definitely enraged at the potential catastrophe that awaits his country.) 

M (Narr)
We think this is the plan.  001 was killed on that island, clearly he was on to something and they had to shut him up.


Felix (Narr)
A nuclear strike should take care of it.

(Silence)

M
There are ten thousand inhabitants on the othr side of that island and that doesn’t include tourists.

Felix (Narr)
Once the hawks get wind of this they won’t care how many people are on that island.

(Cut to:  INT:  Plane cargo hold.  The red light goes off and the klaxon.  Bond opens his eyes and looks briefly at the red light before closing them again and opening them fully.  Next image is of him putting on his parachute while two other men push a package out of the back of the plane.)


M (Narr)
The moon is over the Atlantic tomorrow morning.

Felix (Narr)
Is that relevant?

M (Narr)
The moon’s gravity would maximise the effect of any tsunami.  Can you give us till then to resolve the situation?

Felix (Narr)
Are you sending a unit in?

M (Narr)
You could say that?

(Bond dives out of the lane and sky dives towards the ocean while the plane heads back to blighty.  Bond activates the parachute and drifts gently down into the sea.  Bond triggers the crate to open that preceeded him and reveals a miniature hydrofoil.  Bond gets on board and sets off the island of Santa Feugo.)

Felix (Narr)
Tell Bond he has twelve hours and after that he’ll have a ballistic missile riding his a...

M (Narr)
I’ll be sure to give him your regards, Mister Leiter.

Felix (Narr)
God help us.


M (Narr)
We can only hope.

(A final shot of Bond heading over the water and towards the island as the sun rises into the sky.

Cut to:  INT:  Office.  Early morning.  In Victor Ernst’s chair in his main office Nixon Albrecht sits in his former bosses chair, a huge grin on his face as he enjoys being one of the men finally out of the shadows and in the limelight, a pistol in one hand and a glass in the other.  Across from him Domingo is handcuffed to the chair.  Behind the office in a huge hollowed out cavern pipes and tubes lead to a what looks like the controls from a hydro-electric plant, constantly being monitored by three technicians who occasionally move a dial one way or another depending on the computer read-outs.  Dozens of armed guards populate the area.  Also in the cavern a miniature underground monorail system awaits on standby.  Nixon is all smiles as he attempts to chat with Domingo.)

Nixon
You know you should be happy.

(Domingo remains silent.)

Nixon
You’re going to witness history happening from this island.  The greatest empire of all time will be started by a seemingly natural disaster on this tiny island.  It’ll be amazing.  It’ll dwarf even the British empire at it’s height, will span the globe and the sun will truly never set on it.

(Domingo says nothing.)

Nixon
It’s the metaphorical butterfly’s wings that creates an earthquake.

Domingo
You are going to die.

Nixon
In about forty years, yes.

Domingo
Sooner than you think, by me, my brother or Bond.

Nixon
Miss Seles, the civilized world doesn’t even know about...

(Cho appears as the door seeming slightly stressed.  Domingo turns and see’s Cho’s expression.)

Domingo
You were saying?

Nixon
Just one moment.

(Nixon gets up and goes to the door, leaves the office and talks to Cho under the watchful, smiling gaze of Domingo.  Cho says a few words only to have Nixon fly into a rage at the news, shaking his head and shouting while Cho stands there saying nothing.  Nixon asks something to which he replies with a shake of his head.  Nixon talks some more, pats Cho on the shoulder and Cho leaves.  Nixon re-enters the office and checks his gun before leaning against his desk.  Domingo looks concerned for a moment.)

Domingo
Are you going to kill me?

Nixon
Me?  No.  This is just insurance.  I hate blood.  Someone else will do it for me.

Domingo
Unless you all...

(Nixon’s rage gets the better of him as he gets up and slaps Domingo across the face, silencing Domingo temporarily.)

Domingo
(Continues) ...Get killed first.

(Nixon gestures like he wants to strike her again.  Domingo moves slightly be her expression remains unrepentant.  Nixon refrains and lowers his arm.)

Nixon
We’ll see.  We’ll see.

(Cut to:  Bond scales a rock face steep enough to make without ropes, not horizontal enough NOT to kill you in a fall.  Bond, no slouch to climbing make light work of the face until a piece of it crumbles beneath his foot, causing him to grapple with the face for a moment to prevent his fall.  As he’s stopped he takes a look at the rock face and sees that that the entire face is peppered with a layer of rock that’s covered in holes.  For a moment he thinks about this.)



Bond
Damn.


(Thoughts pushes aside he makes the distance to the top in no time, as he nears the cliff edge however a gash opens up besides him and a cloud of dust and pebbles belches out from the crack in the rock face.  Bond struggles but holds on and catches his breath before climbing over the lip and checking his equipment before moving on.  He removes his pistol and makes his way across the landscape of rock and foliage, looking around for any predators, seeking out as much cover as possible, stopping at one large boulder and checking against a mini computer screen to ascertain where he needs to go, in the corner is a ticking clock telling him how little time he has left before a nuclear strike would obliterate the island.  Bond continues forward with speed and caution.  In the distance Bond hears the merest of clicks and dives for cover behind a a tree as bullets send chunks of wood and dust spinning through the air.  Bond is pinned down with automatic weapon fire peppering the old tree.  Bond waits for a gap in the firing before making his move and once the shooting stops he emerges, only to be met by a flock of six armed guards only feet away and even closer the ever-dangerous Cho equipped with a sword that is pointed at Bond’s throat.  Cho flicks his head agressively to the left.)
Cho
Move!

Bond
Who am I to argue?

(Bond walks with them and is escorted through to a gap in the rocks down a fissure that had been hewn into a staircase, down through a combination of natural and man-made fissures, through stalactite-laden caves where the water was working it’s magic, though for how much longer was up-for-discussion.  Eventually they come to more stairs upward to a large open space where the control-room lurks.  Bond notices the office and sees Nixon’s grin as he appears and allows himself a brief smile as he sees that Domingo is still alive.  Cho leads Bond to the office and opens the door, nodding to Bond to enter.)


Bond
Thank you.

Nixon
(Now behind the desk but gets up when Bond enters anyway.)  Mister Bond, it’s so good that we finally talk as equals rather than me having to talk through that disgusting mannequin, Ernst.

(Bond doesn’t look at Ernst and his attention is solely on Domingo who is handcuffed to the chair still.)

Bond
Are you all right?

Domingo
(Nodding)  I’m fine.

(Cho dumps Bond's gun on his desk and a belt with throwing knives.)


Nixon
Yours, Mister Bond?

Domingo
Mine.

Nixon
Hmmm.  Impressive.

(NIxon sits down and returns his attention to this laptop. )

Nixon
Did you have a safe journey here, Mister Bond?

Bond
Really?  Small talk?  You’re about to change the face of the globe forever and you’re aksing about my trip?

Nixon
Yes, because the one thing all of this will prove is that life goes on.  The world won’t stop spinning because of anything that happens today and when all the dust is settles life will go on.  Oh, by the way you didn’t really think that the entire stock of nana-virus was destroyed when you grounded those planes did you?

Bond
It’s here?

Nixon
Please!  It’s safe, elsewhere.  It’ll still get used but now we have to get our hands dirty.  We’d have prefrred not to do that.

Bond
Killing by remote control rather than having the nerve to pull the trigger yourself.

Nixon
Oh I think you have enough nerve for all of us, 007.

(Tremors grip the cavern yet again.)

Bond
The tremors are your work of course.

Nixon
Ha-ha.  I can’t deny that.  It’s part of the set-up out there.  You’ve arrived just in time, Mister Bond.  In less than forty minutes things will look VERY different out there.  You and Miss Seles will get the chance to watch it first hand.

Bond
I can guess what will happen.

Nixon
Impress me, Mister Bond.

Bond   
I would think that cavern we’re in and the fissure down the island will fill with superheated water causing this side of the island to slide virtually vertically into the water and will create a mega-tsunami that will engulf America’s east coast.

Nixon
(Smacking the desk in delight)  DAMN, YOU’RE GOOD!

Bond
There’s one thing I don’ get though.

(Nixon smiles modestly)


Nixon
Why bother with the tsunami at all?

Domingo
Because he’s crazy.

Nixon
Far from it, Miss Seles, far from it.  If there’s one thing that history has taught us it’s the man has a remarkable ability to deal with adversity ...One at a time; pit a couple of problems against them and those wonderful systems break down.  In 91985 the Armero relief efforts were majorly hampered by the fact that Mexico had just suffered one of its worse earthquakes and vice-versa.  We are about to load the world with two major problems, it may deal with the one but the other will completely overwhelm it.

(Cut to:  Images of how the tsunami and aftermath will play out while Nixon narrates.)

Nixon (Narr)
The side of the island will slide vertically, almost, into the water and cause a huge displacement that will build into a tsunami which will cross the ocean and make landfall in about five hours time, slowly building as it crosses the Atlantic, it will crash down over Florida and wash the Cubans the elderly out to sea before turning it’s attention to the rest of the east coast driving the parasitic filth out of Wall Street as it moves inland.



Bond (Narr)
And the hundreds and thousands of innocent people, what are they?


Nixon (Narr)
A statistic!  After that the relief effort will be concentrating so hard on rehousing the homeless, restoring water and electric supplies and dealing with the aftermath that the disease will be something that’s seen as a minor issue until it swarms around the globe and people are dying at a rate of knots that they’ll realise something has gone horribly wrong, at that point systems will fail and governments will fall and my organisation will swoop in to save the day.

(Back to:  Nixon’s office.)

Nixon
The virus won’t really be anything to worry about as about 2 in 7 have natural immunity to it.

Domingo
NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT?

Bond
Not to them.  It kills off their main hurdle to dominance, population numbers, but leaves them enough of a workforce in place to lord over.

Nixon
Is that so different to what we have now?  The only significant different is that the polulace will be a hell of a lot more mnageable and the ridiculous idea of competition that we currently have ruining the planet will be gone as we have one government and one set of rules.

Domingo
And you think you’re not crazy?

Nixon
I’m really not.  I’m a visionary.  Mister Bond understands.   

Bond
(sarcastic)  Clearly.

Nixon
(sighs)  Mister Bond, consider what is happening in the world.  This island that we stand on now is one with a geological fault running all the way through it, the US government know the significant tsunami risk to a good thirty million people and yet have they done anything to negate that risk?  No.  This is the same country that has the world’s only super-volcano, the very same country who are fracturing the ground beneath their feet for cheap energy.  The world’s economic and military super-power is blind to risk.  This world does not deserve that.  It doesn’t deserve you.  You have been a right royal pain in the arse for my organisation for a long time, but ...I implore you, come over to our side.  It pains me to have to kill you.

Bond
Just like it pains you to have to kill over six billion people.

Nixon
Sometimes you have to burn part of the forest down in order to prevent larger fires later on.

Bond 
You are the larger fire.

Nixon
(Sigh!)  I had hoped for so much better from you, Mister Bond.  Clearly you’re as blind as those you serve.  So let me show you what fate has in store for you. 

(Cut to:  INT:  Cavern.  Bond and Domingo are chained next to an overhanging rock face, beneath them is a sheer drop.  A few metres away on the safety of a platform, Nixon, Cho and the rest of the crew stand in safety.)

Nixon
This and various other pressure points we’ve created in the rock face are where the water will come through.  The heat will shear this unstable side from the island and send it tumbling into the sea.  Good news for you is you’re on the safe side.

Domingo
That’s a relief.

Nixon
However the water will be so hot that as well as shearing the rock face away from the island it will also shear your flesh from your bones, but there’s no point worrying about that.

Domingo
Why’s that?

Nixon
Because the heat from down there is going to become so intense in the next ten minutes it will probably boil you within your own skin.

Bond
Nixon.

Nixon
Yes.

Bond
This really isn’t going to end well for you.

(Nixon and his men laugh.  Nixon wipes a tear of laughter away as he is taken with the comment.)

Nixon
Oh dear.  Goodbye, Mister Bond.  Enjoy your front seat at the end of your world.

Bond
Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

(Nixon, Cho and his hired goons leave Bond and Domingo chained to the wall above the precipice.)

Domingo
What a way to go.

Bond
It would be, if Nixon knew anything about geology.  NGGGGH!

(Bond puts everything he has into pulling his left arm and after a gargantuan amount of effort he manages to rip the chain from the wall.)

Bond
The volcanic rock here and in certain sections of the island is highly porous and with the water they’re flooding in here it’s weakening it.  We’d have died from the fall as these bonds weaken long before the heat got to us.

Domingo
Thank you, that’s reassuring.

(Bond pulls his leg free and grabs the edge of the overhang they’re attached to.)

Bond
If we can both get free then we have a chance to get out of here.

(Bond pulls his other leg free, has one hand on the over hang but still has one arm chained to the wall.  As he hangs the wall rumbles and ledge Bond was gripping crumbles causing Bond to hang from the last remaining chain attached to the wall.)

Bond
Sorry about this.

(Bond swings himself so he’s holding onto one of Domingo’s chains as his last mooring comes free.  He then re-grips the ledge as the cavern shakes again.  This time the ledge stays put.)

Bond
You need to pull yourself free.  We don’t have much time.

Domingo
And when I do how are we going to escape?

Bond
I’ll grab you and swing you over to the platform.

Domingo
But then how will you get over?

Bond
I’ll swing my legs and the momentum should carry me over.

(Domingo looks down into the chasm.)

Domingo
Okay.  I like this plan.  NGGGGH!  (She pulls her left arm free.)  This is a good plan.  NGGGGH!  (Her left leg comes free.  She holds Bond’s right hand with her left hand and tries to get her right leg free.)  Two more then momentum over to the platform  What could go wrong?  NGGGGGH!  (Her right leg comes free leaving her right arm attached only.  As they stop for a moment the island rumbles menacingly.)

Bond
Let’s go.

Domingo
COME ON!

(Domingo pulls her arm free and Bond catches her, swings her to the right and then as hard as he can to the left.  As he does he realises she’ll never make it, so he keeps hold of her swings her to the right again and then back over to the left.  Domingo moves through the air and lands on the platform, Bond moves his spare hand up for extra support just as his previous handhold gives way again.)

Bond
Guess it’s better to be lucky than good.

(The rocks seem to yawn out their disappointment in Bond’s survival skills as the water pressure builds inside them.)

Domingo
James, come on!

Bond
Be right with you.

(Bond looks at the craggy rock face he’s just unhooked himself from and finds an outcrop to propel himself from.  He jams his foot against it, looks back at the platform which somehow looks further away than before.  Bond pushes his foot against the rock face and jettisons himself towards the platform.  He hurls through the air in slow-motion as a quake rattles through the island.

Cut to:  FLASHBACK.  INT.  Hotel.  Domingo and Bond are back at the bar, laughing, the conversation interspersed with him reaching for the platform.)

Domingo
Can I ask you something about what you do?

Bond
I don’t see why not.

Domingo
The job you do seems very dangerous.

Bond
It is sometimes.

Domingo
How have you managed to stay alive so long?

(Bond takes a drink before responding.)

Bond
You know how people say that when they’re in a crisis time slows down?

Domingo
I’ve heard that said, yes.

Bond
It isn’t time slowing down but their mind speeding up.  That’s what it’s like for me, be it bullets flying at me, jumping off a crane or fighting some machete-wielding maniac while walking backwards down some stairs.

(Domingo frowns at the last one.)
Bond
You don’t want to know.

Domingo
So this is why you’re IMPOSSIBLE to kill?

Bond
(Suddenly becoming very serious)  No ...Not impossible.  In this line of work all it takes is for the right bullet or the wrong circumstance and you’re a goner.

(Back to:  INT:  Cavern.  Bond reaches for the rail at the platform but as the cavern rocks due to the tremors the rail moves fractionally, but enough critically so that Bond’s projected grabbing point shifts.  The agent’s handsmacks against the barrier as does his arm, his body crashing against the metal bars.  As Bond falls into the desolate blackness of the cavern his arms flailing as he tries to grab hold of something, anything.  His eyes show an awareness as he realises that he has at last ran out of great escapes and his body goes limp as he closes his eyes.

















Two hands reach out and grab Bond’s arm.  Bond looks up and holding on desperately tight to him is Domingo, her legs hooked around the metal rails on the platform, the pirate’s daughter retaining her grip with a steely determination that reveals itself again as it hd in every crisis they’d shared.)

Domingo
Not yet it’s the end!

(Bond grabs her arm with his free hand.  He swings himself up to the platform and grabs hold of the rails and hoists himself on to the metal support his boots connecting solidly with the structure.)

Domingo
You save me, I save you.

Bond
Thanks.  I’m not used to that.

Domingo
First time for everything.  What now?

Bond
We stop Albrecht and his man-made natural disaster.  Let’s go.

(Cut to:  INT:  Ernst’s office.  Nixon is packing everything away whilst whistling a happy tune.)

Nixon
Fifteen minutes and this place will be no more and only hours after neither will Florida, Maine, North and South Carolina, and trust me the lights really will be going down in Massachesetts.

(Nixon looks at Cho who grants him no response.)

Nixon
Not a Bee Gees fan, huh?

Cho
I prefer Nikki Minaj.

(Nixon stops what he’s doing and just stares at Cho for a moment.)

Nixon
You know sometimes I feel l don’t know you at all.

(Another tremor ripples through the island.)

Nixon
It’s getting time.  Let’s go.

(Cho nods.   Nixon grabs his laptop and heads out of the office, as he opens the door he sees two of his guards blocking his way, as he looks down he see two more guards on the floor.  Nixon looks up and now recognises Bond who flashes the briefest of smirks before smacking Nixon in the face with the butt of an automatic rifle.  Cho moves to land a punch on Bond till Domingo emerges from behind Bond similarly armed with the rifle pointing straight at Cho’s heart.)

Domingo
Let’s see you try and dodge all these bullets!

Nixon
Do you honestly think you can kill me and waltz out of here?  My men will rip this office to shreds.  You made a big mistake coming here alone.

Bond
Who says I’m alone?

(From out of the cracks in the walls the SBS team emerge like the xenomorphs in "ALIENS" as they drop on several on the armed guards.  Gunfire starts and even Domingo is momentarily distracted by the sound.  Cho takes advantage and throws some files at her and leaps at Bond who is able to counter and throw the smaller man to the side.  Nixon tries to get past but Bond, grabbing his computer stops him.)

Bond
I think not.

(Cho kicks Bond in the back and elbows him to the side of the head sending him sprawling  to the floor.  Nixon retrieves a gun before Domingo can.)

Nixon
I think so.

(The room rumbles as the island destabilizes even more.)

Nixon
Cho, let’s go!

(The two men run out and head towards the monorail.)

Domingo
James, are you all right.

Bond
Fine, did they leave?

(Domingo nods)

Bond
Monorail?

(Domingo nods again)

Bond
Good.  Get out with the SBS when they leave this place will be reduced to ash.

Domingo
Where are you going?

Bond
To catch a train.

(Bond runs out and throws himself across the plateau of machinery and through the ongoing battle taking as direct a route as possible to catch Nixon and Cho.  In slow-motion we see the bullets spin past him as he seems to temper his run to avoid them.  Whether through luck or design he manages to remain in one piece.  From the office Domingo removes three of her recovered weapons of choice and hurls the spinning blades at a number of guards who notice Bond’s run, the blades ending their interest in his pursuit.  As Nixon and Cho set off Bond jumps onto the rail itself and then the monorail.  Nixon and Cho turn around.)

Nixon
FINISH HIM!

(Cho nods and leaps over the seat only to have Bond catch his feet before they make contact with his chest.  Bond swings Cho against the wall, but the speed they’re going Cho merely bounces off the wall and lands back in the vehicle, launching a sweep at Bond’s feet sending him tumbling to the floor.  As the monorail hurtles through the rock the wall’s vibrate and tremble as the volatile half of the island starts to get perilously close to falling into the ocean.  Bond and Cho exchange short sharp blows while Nixon hugs his laptop unconcerned as the two men beat each other with vicious brutality, both knowing that death awaits the loser.

Cut to:  INT:  Cavern Control Room.  The SBS secure the control room and head over to the huge hydro-electric apparatus to see what they can do.  Domingo waltzes over to the men and raises her hands as the men raise their weapons.)

Domingo
I’m Domingo Seles, I’m with 007.

(They lower their weapons and the officer in charge removes his face mask.)

Major
I don’t suppose you know how to switch this bloody thing off?

Domingo
You can’t, there’d no way it can be shut down.

Major
Bollocks!  Time to go to plan B then.  (Removes walkie-talkie)  Nest?  Sparrow.  Need to send the eagles in once we’ve evacuated, over.

Walkie-Talkie
Roger that, Sparrow.

Domingo
What’s going on?

Major
We’re evacuating.  Need to get out of here so they can Cruise missile this side of the island into oblivion.  If it’s only rubble landing in the water the effect on the ocean will be negligible.

Domingo
But what about James?

Major
He knows where he has to be, he’s the one who gave the briefing. 

(Back to:  INT:  Cavern monorail.  Bond and Cho continue to trade blows as the monorail speeds to an unknown destination through the jagged, unstable crags.  Eventually the silky smooth ride comes to  stop and the two combatants tumble as lovers from the vehicle as they continue their bitter exchange.  Nixon meanwhile calmly gets out and is about to get into another waiting vehicle as when he stops to watch the two men about to slug it out on the train platform unrestricted by the confines of the previous vehicle.  Cho and Bond circle each other as the cavern trembles in anticipation of the oncoming destruction.)

Bond
It doesn’t have to end like this.  Give me Nixon and all you’ll have lost is some flesh and an eye.

Cho
I made my choice a long time ago, Mister Bond.  I stand by that choice, loyalty is everything.

Bond
All right.

(Cho spins a kick and Bond ducks beneath to sweep the standing leg but Cho has already moved out of the way and launches a punch to Bond’s head which connects, severely knocking the agent to the ground and sending him dizzy.  Bond get’s up but it immediately appears to be a battle too many as Cho launches a series of blistering attacks to Bond’s head stomach and face, finishing off with a kick to the head that sends Bond sprawled against the wall.  Behind Cho, Nixon looks at his watch and shakes his head.)

Nixon
Come on, Cho, we need to go.

(Cho turns to acknowledge Nixon and as he does Bond grabs some of the porous masonry and smashes it against the nimble assassin’s head sending Blood gushing down the side of his face and wraps his fingers around the assassin’s throat squeezing with everything he has left.  Nixon looks down at his watch as an alarm goes off on his watch while the fight continues.)

Nixon
Six minutes.  Shit!

(The QUANTUM operative moves over to a second monorail system and sneakily gets in the vehicle.  He takes one last look back and sees Cho break free from Bond’s grip and start to regain the upper hand but Nixon shakes his head and starts the vehicle.)

Nixon
Sorry, old friend.  We’re out of time...

(Cho looks round and sees Nixon start to leave.)

Cho
NO!  WAIT!

(The carriage sets off down the tunnel and Cho sets off to catch up with the vehicle.  As the monorail enters a tunnel Nixon removes a grenade from inside his jacket and pulls the pin.)

Nixon
...And I can’t afford for Mister Bond to catch me this time.

(Nixon throws the grenade back and the tiny device explodes sealing the tunnel behind him.  Cho stops, dejected for a second then turns back to Bond who is on the floor now trying to recover.  Cho kicks him back down and then grabs him by the lapel and readis his fist for a killing blow.)

Cho
It’s your lucky day, Mister Bond.

(He then let’s go of agent’s shirt and runs to a set of stairs in the rock attempting to make good his own escape.  Bond staggers to his feet.)

Nixon
It doesn’t feel like it.

(Bond goes back to the other monorail and launches it back to the control room as fast as it will let him.  By now the walls are vibrating hard sending rocks onto the track in front and behind him, coming down so hard that even the unflappable agent appears to show some nerve.)

Bond
Come on!  Come on!

(As the monorail moves on Bond’s watch beeps an aggressive warning.  Bond looks at it as it flashes up the message 4:58, 4:57, 4:56.  Bond knows that this means that the missiles will soon be flying and that is the likely time till they hit.  The monorai comes to a halt and as Bond looks around he sees...)

Domingo
JAMES!

Bond
What the bloody hell are you doing here?  Why didn’t you leave with the marines?

Domingo
You came back for me, I wasn’t about to leave without you.  It wouldn’t be proper.

Bond
Well if we don’t get out of here in less than five minutes this place will be collapsing arond us good and proper, come on!

(The two of them make their way at speed through the route that brought them here.  Bond pulls out one of the buttons on his watch.

Cut to:  EXT:  Ocean.  Bond’s hydrofoil starts automatically, the display screen showing the layout of the island and moves to where it thinks Bond will be.

Cut to:  EXT:  Ocean:  Open sea.  A nuclear sub loads the assault team who killed Nixon’s men.



Cut to:  INT:  The Major heads up to the sub’s Commander as he boards the vessel.)

Commander
Report?

Major
All men we could get are back aboard.

Commander
And Bond?

(The Major shakes his head.)

Major
And the woman elected to stay behind to wait for him.

Commander
More fool her.

(Cut to:  EXT:  Sierra Fuego, open ground.  Bond and Domingo run as fast as they can towards a cliff edge and stop just before hey tumble into the water.)

Domingo
You serious?

Bond
The missiles will be here in about sixty seconds, it’s either fall or flame.

Domingo
Fall it is then.

(The two of them jump silently over the edge, their faces focussed as they plummet into the choppy waters, as they land they swim to the surface and, as they emerge, the automated miniature hydrofoil appears.  Bond and Domingo get onboard, Bond checks his watch and sees there’s 30 seconds left only and, as he looks at the horizon, he sees the missiles vapour trails head high into the sky.)

Bond
Oh no!

(He pulls on the throttle as Domingo tightens her grip around his waist.  In the sky at least forty high-yield non-nuclear devices head towards the volatile half of Sierra Fuego.  Bond keeps the vapour trails in view as long as he can while trying to travel as far and as quickly as possible from the island.  As he drives the tiny craft forward he sees a second wave of missiles appearing from over the horizon.)

Domingo
God help us.

(The view changes to above as Bond, a mere spec on the ocean, travels one way and the missiles, looming large fly the opposite towards the island.  Bond and Domingo aim to keep themselves as flat as possible to the tiny craft to minimize drag as the world seems to go quiet for a moment before the world goes light and loud as the missiles plunge into the gorge and smash against the rock face exploding without and within the island so that the solid mass of rock starts to break up.  Bond’s face shows only the merest of flickers as his eyes dart up and then back to the ocean to watch the path of the kill missiles, the ones that would render the gorge into a crevasse and the mass of the volatile island into so much rubble.)
Bond
Just keep your eyes forward, Domingo.  Don’t look back.

Domingo
What exactly should I be looking at?

Bond
THAT!

(Bond points and Domingo makes out a protrusion in the water.  The conning tower of the submarine starts to emerge from the water as the second wave strikes the island and turns the island from mass into dust, all of the dust landing as bits in the water, causing a sizable wave but not a Tsunami, but a sufficient wave that could crash over and kill Bond and Domingo.  Bond pushes the thought of their imminent death to the back of his mind as he pushes the hydrofoil forward towards the submarine so he traverses the length of the vehicle before coming to a a stop next to the tower.  Bond and Domingo leave the vehicle and start to clamber of the conning tower, only now do they look back at what is heading towards them.  The wave is now closing fast on the two escapees and they throw themselves into the top of the conning tower as the wave smacks into the back of the submarine.)

Bond
HOLD ON!

(The wave buffets the heavy metal container that groans in agony under the enormous strain as the natural world show’s the tin can’s occupants just how fragile their vehicles are as every connection, every nut, every weld and every seam is pressed and pushed harder than it was ever intended to be pressed.  The subs creaks and groans draw concern from all who are sailing in the vessel except for the ship’s captain who merely looks round eyebrows raised but calm that his boat would endure.  Somehow, in spite of the enormous pressure, the tub holds itself together and virtually surfs the wave as the sea’s monumental molehill of a wave, in the grand scale of things, passes by.  Bond and Domingo smile and laugh, fear turning to relief and joy as they get back to their feet and watch the island crumble, rather than slide into the sea.)

Seaman
Let’s get you to inside before another wave hits, shall we?

(Bond and Domingo oblige.

Cut to:  INT:  Submarine.  Bond and Domingo land on the deck.  Bond and the ship’s Commander salute.)

Bond
Permission to come aboard, sir.

Commander
 Permission granted.

Bond
Thanks for the lift, Roger.


Commander
We’re not a bloody taxi service, James.
Bond
Oh I’m sorry what do I owe you?

(Bond gestures like he’s trying to remove his wallet.)

Commander
You’re lucky I’m on duty.

(Bond’s colleague and friend walks away and Bond smiles but Domingo looks troubled.)


Bond
I never got chance to tell you in there but Ozul’s fine by the way.

Domingo
Good.

Bond
That’s not what’s troubling you?

Domingo
Nixon got away.  Everything we’ve been through will be for nothing now.

Bond
Don’t worry it’s taken care of.

(Cut to:  EXT:  Santa Fuego streets.  The population are moving at speed through the streets as after-shocks ripple through the inhabited half of the island, walking through these people, almost unnoticed looking just as scared, Nixon Albrecht heads through them, Laptop held close to his chest.)

Domingo (Narr)
What do you mean?


Bond (Narr)
Let’s just say we’ll know very soon what their next move will be.

(Close-up.  In one of the laptop’s USB ports a very small device has been inserted.

Cut to:  INT:  MI6 headquarters.  Q and a team of programmers begin to pour over the data coming in from Nixon’s computer with lists of operatives and locations.  The office is almost overwhelmed by the details coming in as Q flicks through screens himself to get to pertinent information.  M is in one of the ante-room offices smiling as he watches his operatives tear through the details.

FADE TO BLACK.

Cut to:  INT:  Vienna opera house.  Night.  The QUANTUM heads who cut such arrogant and swaggering figures at the start of the tale appear now more sombre, more cautious as the sit pocketed around the house in the boxes as the orchestra play out the final movement the Nutcracker Suite.  The bald-headed, stony-faced leader whose imposing visage was the kind men would die in battle protecting now has featured that seem like they have been scarred by battle losses that have left him withdrawn into a bunker mentality, his hands trembling slightly place his earpiece into his ear carefully.)



Member 3
How did they know?

Member 2
They hacked Nixon’s Albrecht’s computer.

Member 3
I hate computers.  They spill their guts at every question.  I prefer how things used to be when such high profile details where kept in the safe of men’s minds.  They were far harder to crack.  Where is Nixon Albrecht now?

Member 2
We’ve tried to track him down but he’s a ghost at the moment.  It looks like he fled to Russia.  With our operations being compromised when Puchev was caught it’s left us largely without eyes there.

(Cut to:  INT:  A Russian hotel.  Swept in opulence the rooms are steeped in the traditions of Grand design inside the room however the man who occupies the room seems far from grand as he hurriedly packs his possessions.  Nixon Albrecht then picks up his suitcase and heads to the door.)

Member 3 (Narr)
He’ll show up eventually.

Mr White (Narr)
What if he doesn’t?

(Nixon straightens his tie and opens the door and is greeted by the back of a hotel waiter standing ready with a luggage trolley.  Nixon does not register the man’s shortness of stature or slight limp.)

Member 3 (Narr)
Then we keep looking until he does.

(The waiter turns and grabs his walking stick with both hands and removes a straight blade from the stick, a surly grimace on his scarred visage showing neither pity nor remorse as Nixon shakes his head in fear.

Back to:  INT:  Viennese Opera House.  The orchestra are in full flow as they build to a crescendo.)

Member 1
Do you think that’s how they found out the location of the virus?

Member 3
It would seem our outspoken and arrogant friend may have been a little too outspoken.

(Behind Member 1 has champagne arrives.  As the waiter shows him the label he looks at it and nods approvingly.  Across the theatre similar waiters enter the QUANTUM leaders booths with similar beverages as they drown their sorrows in the most expensive way possible.)

Member 4
Is that why you summoned us here?

Member 3
What are you talking about?  I didn’t summon any of you here?

Member 2
Well it wasn’t me?

Member 1
Nor I.

Bond
Might I make a suggestion?

(The commanding features of QUANTUM’s head now bear a look of hate, the kind of which we haven’t seen him display before.)

Member 1
Mister Bond, codename 007, Agent of MI6, service awards for valour, many, weaknesses, women and alcohol, lifespan ....Short.

(The assorted members of QUANTUM begin to remove their earpieces and attempt to leave.)

Bond
And I know so little about you.  I guess it’s true what they say knowledge is power.

Member 1
That’s right.

Bond
But it’s not how much you know ...It’s WHAT you know.

(The various members of QUANTUM who are peppered throughout the building in the ornamental boxes suddenly find their ways blocked by the waiters who brought them their champagne.  The orchestra who were playing The Nutcracker Finale suddenly switch to the finale of the 1812 overture.  The waiters who are about to do anything but wait are armed with a variety of instruments, from pistols, to blades, to garroting wire who start to despatch the various leading members of QUANTUM, their leader, who realises that the opera house was not a meeting but a trap, he downs his champagne and the camera moves around him to show a waiter stood behind him with a silenced pistol aimed at his head.  He has the resigned look of a man who has ran out of moves and knows what is coming.)

Member 1
Make it quick.

(The waiter squeezes the trigger.)

Waiter
That quick enough for you.  (The waiter inserts an earpiece.)  Report.

(Cut to:  INT:  Vienna Opera house.  At the back of the opera house Bond and Felix stand together drinking the same champagne.)

Bond
I do like a rousing final movement.


Felix
It all sounds the same to me.

Bond
One down...

Felix
...And another twenty more where they came from to go.

(Bond removes his buzzing phone)

Bond
Damn.

Felix
New mission?

Bond
You could say that.  Till next time.

Felix
Yep.

(Bond leaves Felix to finish the champagne and enjoy the mellowed fruits of their hollow victory.)

Cut to:  INT:  Penthouse suite, Palais Hansen Kempinski hotel.  Bond enters the hotel room, switches on the light and smiles.  He removes his jacket and a blade flashes past him, calm and unphased he merely hangs his jacket on the blade and turns to face...)

Bond 
Hello, Domingo.  Are you here alone or is baby brother with you?

Domingo
I’m here alone.  He knew I’d be safe if you were here.

Bond
May I ask what you’re doing in Vienna.


Domingo
I never did get to thank you properly for saving me.

(They kiss, a hungrily the way two people, held back by restraints of circumstance and situation, can only know when free from the binds of duty, family and conflict.  His hands move over her neck, her hands beneath his shirt as he picks her up and takes her into the bedroom.  They tumble to the bed as he fingers slide through his hair and her left leg slides up and around his waist.  They kiss some more with ravenous delight, senses heightening, desire mounting as weeks of unresolved passion are let loose in reckless abandon.

Cut to:  EXT:  Hotel exterior.)




Domingo
You did manage to get some sleep when you got back, didn’t you?

Bond
Yes.

Domingo
Good.

(They giggle like naughty schoolkids before falling into lustful silence.)

Cue credits.

THE END

JAMES BOND WILL RETURN IN “POLAR ECLIPSE.”

And there we have it.  My Bond script.  I had to add an end bit of course because after concluding this monumental work I found that it was ...Hard to switch off.  Once your mind starts going down such places it's easier to think like a villain and you get a nice flavour of just what the world could be like if you were a wealthy megalomaniac with a thousand options at your fingertips with bio-terrorism, political terrorism, economic terrorism, cyber terrorism and even terrorism-terrorism at your disposal, but for me of course it was environmental terrorism the kind of which we have in this story that caught my attention.

Now obviously at some stage there will be a James Bond Tsunami story as it is inevitable, with it being something that is getting more common the Bond writers will turn their attentions to it and will probably look at doing their own version which is why I had to get in there with mine first, make sure the world had something to go off before making a judgement on their next attempt.

Like I always say though after these herculean tasks I hope you enjoyed it, please leave a comment, Google plus, share or like if you enjoyed and as long as people keep enjoying what I do I will keep doing it.

Till next time.  Sayonara.



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